week 38 day 4

I must drive Mike crazy sometimes because as changes draw closer, I become a bit crazy and obsessed.

"Mike, this is our last Christmas with just the two of us."
"Mike, this is the last time we'll ever get to enjoy our birthdays without kids."
"Mike, this is our last vacation with no kids to worry about."
And once K arrived ...
"Mike, this is our last Easter with only one child."
"Mike, this could be our last Fast Sunday with only one child."
"Mike, this is our last April 21 with only one child."
"Mike, this is our last April 22 with only one child."

And it goes on and on and on. Poor Mikey. But I only speak the truth.

This week I've set it especially aside for just Mike and I. I'm looking forward to spending some good quality time with just Mike and K and this weekend is all about Mike and I. Because it's our last April weekend with only one child!

It's crazy how inevitable all this is. If I could stop time or reverse, I would. As much as I don't like all that comes with pregnancy, I'm not really ready to have another baby. I stared at this couple with a baby who couldn't have been more than a month old at Costco today. And the poor parents looked exhausted. I remember that like it was yesterday. Ugh. Miserable.

Our 38-week appointment was today. No change (3 cm & 80% effaced) but I wasn't expecting any change. Because I've been sick, I don't think my weight even changed. I've been forcing myself to eat the last few days because I know my body needs it, I just don't feel like eating. Oh, well actually, the baby's head is down so he's ready to come out whenever, I guess. That was different.

I wish I didn't have such anxiety over change. I'm sure it'll be fine ... I've been noticing the hundreds and hundreds of people who have more than one child and they all seem to be doing just fine. So I guess I will too. It's just ... yikes. Two kids. And change.