week 14 day 7

For one of February's activities for my work, we're going ice skating.  I was pretty excited because I haven't been yet this Winter season and am ready to go!  I remember 2 year's ago ice skating events ... Gallivan  Center and fun with Christa and friends but awkwardness because of the people I had told about me being there that made me think maybe I should've never mentioned it ... and ice skating with Mikey ... more awkwardness because he informed me that he had just sat down with his ex to discuss their relationship.  I guess he told her it was over and that he was dating me ... that sounds like a fun experience.  Last year's event was more fun seeing as we were engaged and not talking about exes ...

This year I was excited until moments after thinking of how much I'd improve this year on those small little blades that I remembered, I'm pregnant.  Not only am I currently but when we actually go, I'll be at 20 weeks and of course, won't be able to go.  Bummer.

I feel really blessed and am excited for this new phase of life but there were multiple reasons why I didn't want to have a baby too soon in our marriage.  I thought I had 2+ years to prepare.

1. I wanted to have a real job (the ones we talk about when we're 5 and then realize they might be crazy ideas as we grow older but still pursue anyway)
2. I wanted to grow up and mature
   
3. I wanted to have a house
4. I wanted to have a puppy even more than a house
5. I wanted to watch my friends have their children so I could learn from them
6. I wanted to have time with Mike as a married couple.  The 16 months of dating were great but I felt like I just wanted time with him ... maybe I'm selfish
7. And to be honest, I didn't want the responsibility.  It's a lot of responsibility and I'm guessing you can't ever prepare for it, but I was hoping more time would help.
   

But now we're waiting for a baby and every day I wake up thinking of how I'm going to take advantage of today.  Some days I have great and glorious plans and those seem to be the days where I spend most of my time on the couch or in bed because I'm sick and/or exhausted.  Maybe the planning wore me out.  Other days I complain to Mike that this is our last January 8th, or which ever date it is, childless and we need to live it up.  Some days I snuggle up with Mike because I realize this won't happen again next year because everything will be different.  Even if the baby is sound asleep and we're just cuddling, it won't be the same as right now.

I'm thinking about the next few months and all of the things I want to do together before the baby comes ...

• celebrate our birthdays together ... I was thinking Bed & Breakfast because the only ones we've been to have been in Italy.  It'd be nice to know what ones are like in the states.  But we might need to do it before our birthdays because am I really going to enjoy it the more pregnant I get?  Well, it might be really relaxing
• go to the movie theater ... because soon we won't be able to without getting a babysitter.  Although, I don't really like the theater because it's loud, there's germs all over my seat, and I get bored during movies.  But Mike loves movies and I love Mike, so we go.
• go out to nice restaurants ... soon we won't be able to do that either without getting a babysitter.  Well, maybe we can depending on the niceness.  But it won't be the same with a little one.
• build a snow bear ... because Mike has been promising for 2 years that he'd build a snow penguin with me and hasn't yet.  We decided a bear would be more appropriate for our relationship a few months ago and perhaps we can make one with pants.  But this is our last chance ... just the 2 of us.
• sleep in every morning ... every morning I wake up enjoying the sleep (or the fact that I just went to sleep for the first time all night) that I have because soon I won't get the chance to sleep through the night for a while.  Although the little one is only 4 oz, I feel like he's having a hay day in there and my bladder just can't take it.  I'm excited for when he's 4+ pounds and is tossing and turning.  My poor little bladder.  And then up for feedings and crying ... mmm.  Fun.

And these have been my latest worries.  This past week I've been awake most of the night or I get up super early (this morning was 6 am.  Poor Mikey's sick and scares me from my dreams with his coughing and such.  I've never had such a loud, sick roommate before) and wish I was asleep.  Maybe this is just preparing me though.  And during these early hours, I think of my life to come.  It will be so great and so challenging.  Lucky for the kid(s), I love a challenge and as much as I may complain, I almost never give up.

I've been craving pizza.  We made some last week and I thought it was awful.  It saved us money but it's nothing compared to Brick Oven Pizza.  Mmm ...  Maybe Mike will take me there tonight after his work.  Although I'd be happy with anything.  I'm a food addict, lately.  If I go more than an hour without it, I crave it.  My stomach feels like it starts shriveling up and my brain tells me I need food or I might die.  So I eat.

Speaking of food, a couple days ago I was craving fruit.  I was craving it so badly that I was seriously going crazy.  Mike, unfortunately, was on campus with the car and I was losing my mind.  So he returned and took me to Costco to get a big bag of fruit.  He told me that he might need a smoothie and that I probably needed a churro.  I agreed until I saw the ice cream bar on the menu.  I had been craving one.  So we got it and it was amazing.  Ice cream on the inside, dipped in chocolate, and rolled in almonds.  Mmmmm ... Although I hope this doesn't mean that the baby's getting the Corrigan genes with a love for sugar.  This is the problem:  I'm Asian and have a deep love for noodles, rice, sushi, curry, and all the good stuff.  Mike's Irish and has a deep love for potatoes and sugar.  Good luck, baby.

Week 15 ... here we come!